First Copy Critique Of This Newsletter

Hey {{first_name|Bro}},

In my 111th email, I said this in Cta:

And guess what, I got 3 replies, but first I got Rupesh’s reply, so I went over his copy.

If you didn’t read my 111th email, read here:

Then come back to this raw value copy review. So, you can understand it properly.

This review’s black text will be Rupesh’s copy, and blue text will be my review.

Copy:

SL- best skill to make money as a beginner 

Review: Generic and everyone says the same, so make it unique and intriguing like:

"The Only Skill You Need To Be Rich In Your 20s"

I said to make 5 subject lines, but you didn't also reread my email and work on it

Copy:

Hey Tom

Have you ever been in a situation where you had to pick one thing from a dozen choices?

I was in the same spot two years ago

Figuring out what skill would actually make money as a complete beginner

Review: The wording can be better, and it's a good question to start an email. Why is there a sudden gap or space here?

Is it AI? Or you just write like this, which doesn't show professionalism and formatting standards.

Either give a full stop or give a comma a continue the sentence.

And there’s a huge chance that you might be there now

Thinking, “Eh….what should I even learn to make money…”

So, after testing 4 different business models(from e-commerce to YouTube automation) and making over $300,000 combined

I can confidently say-

‘Copywriting’ is best for beginners

Review:

break in flow, where did you get the chance at sudden?

After this review, read your copy aloud, and you will find the mistakes by yourself.

And these Disrupt parts need serious work, or just reader will just walk away from here, and you will lose CTR too. The flow and formatting need a lot of work.

Let me explain why it beats other shiny objects out there-

3. You don’t need to hire a team or build complex systems like in SMMA

It is literally so simple(but not easy)

Review: Bullets are good, but I would say the word "you don't need" can be written differently, so it shouldn't sound repetitive. 

Don't use this phrase “let me explain and repetitive things”, it will make me feel borrow.

It is literally so simple(but not easy)

All you need is a laptop and the internet

So, if copywriting seems interesting and something you would like to try

I’ve recorded a free step-by-step beginner’s guide exclusively for my email subscribers

Grab it now because it’s going to be paid next week

and save yourself months of painful “trial and error”(trust me it’s not fun)

Cheers

Rupesh

Review:

All like in your email is intrigue part, but if you do not reveal the skill name "copy", then this copy will be more intriguing.

Cause it's called a masking technique or loopholes.

CTA Could be:

If you really want this skill which can pay you, either you  work from your balcony or bathroom,

I've recorded an  A-Z beginner-friendly video on this skill, especially for you, at no cost.

And get this video soon, cause I will set the price for this video exactly after 36 hours.

So, be fast and learn the skills which fill your bank balance.

I reviewed only one email out of three cause I want you to make this email better first, then I will move to the other emails.

All the best, and let me know.

-AshuRex

Streak: 114

P.S.

If you didn’t watch my recent video on What Is Siny Object Syndrome And 5 Ways To Cure It,

Tap here to watch it.

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If you have any queries, feel free to ask by replying to this email. 

I will get back to you ASAP.